What was mistaken for closeness was just a case of mitosis

I am alone.
I see the birds flying above, and I am alone.
When I go to sleep at night, I am alone.
I go to campus, alone.
I leave campus, alone.
I wake up in the morning, and I am alone.

Solitude is often mistaken for sadness.
Do you see me drive by alone in my car?
I am not sulking, I am not frowning.
I am smiling.
I am dancing.
I am clapping.
I am happy to be alive.
I just happen to be alone.

But I am not sad.

Just because a person is alone
Does not mean they are not satisfied in life.
I have found more joy being alone than I ever had
Being part of a pair

What was mistaken for closeness
Was just a case of mitosis

Are all relationships like this?

Can you be part of a successful relationship with someone who is a carbon copy of yourself?
Would you not be bored all of the time?
At every moment, I know precisely how you will react,
Because you are me and I am you.
There would be no excitement.
No uncertainty.

What defines success? (Our goals)

My goal is to be alone.
I am successful.

My goal is to be happy.
I am successful.

My goal is to write in strange phrasing.
Success belongs solely to me.

This is not a sad post, but a post of the most sincere nature.

I am happy. Believe me when I say it.

Looks like...

It's time to start blogging again.

I call this episode: forever alone...but not necessarily forever unhappy.

My older sister just got engaged today/tonight. Words cannot describe how elated I am for the two of them! Thrilled!!

My little sister is on a date with her boyfriend right now. Watching a Steel Magnolias remake with an all-black cast. What quirkiness. Gag me it's so cute.

And I...I sit at home, "chuffed to bits" that my cat does not hate me today. Right now. She does not hate me *right now*. I'm also pondering when I'm going to get raped. Not because I am convinced that I am going to get raped at some point in my life, or because I think that my raping is part of God's plan, but because someone on Pinterest posted tips for women on how to get rid of a rapist.

Excuse me?

Yes. Tips to women from rapists on what scared them off from potential victims.

How am I supposed to know that this article was not actually written by psychopaths who love raping women who fight back? Maybe this article is comprised of tips on how to get yourself a 100% guarantee raping. "It's fail-proof or your money back! Peace of mind returned at additional charge." Um...what? Yes. These are the things that I think of "tips" anyone gives to everyone. Other girls read these messages like "Oh yeah! That's a good point! I will absolutely remember this for the next time I'm getting raped" and I'm over here like "You know? I'll just keep eating pizza. Men don't rape girls who aren't hot and talk nonsense all the time..."

Re: not being forever unhappy.

I can create my own happiness. Nobody needs to do that for me. (Plus, I can always buy more cats. Shelters will love me once I have my own place.)

Ode to Wasp

In the morning
When I wake up
Your bright shining face
Is the last thing
On my "to do" list.
Maybe the "to kill" list
But never the "I REALLY WANNA SEE YA RIGHT NOW GET YOUR SWEET SUGAR BOTTOM OVER HERE" list.

So when I was graced
By your ever so lovely presence
This morning, I knew it would be your last.
You've tortured me for a first and final time,
Mr. Wasp.
Not everyone can live forever
Certainly not you.

Is it a spider? Is it a fly?
NO.
It's a wasp. A freaking wasp.

Does it really serve any purpose?
Will it leave you alone if you leave it alone?
NO.
It's a motha freakin wasp.

It's a life sucker, a sleep robber
A bug spray whore
A heart starter.

I hate mornings
But I hate them even more
WHEN YOU'RE IN MY FACE.