But really, I just wanted to use you as a human bike lock.
What is a human bike lock, you ask? Allow me to paint you a picture.
We ride bikes together. I go inside, because I didn't really want you coming with me, I just wanted you to keep an eye on my bike. But, seeing as how you also had to ride a bike to watch my own, you have to watch both bikes. Easy as pie. I'll be joining you in an hour. Maybe longer.
Hope you brought a book.
Or an iPod. At the very least, you've got your cell phone.
Or did you forget to charge it last night? Looks like you'll be writing novels in the snow.
Don't you dare step inside the lobby. You knew what you were getting into when you offered to ride with me. It's not my fault you didn't grab handwarmers and extra gloves when we left the house.
It's 60 degrees today? Splendid! You won't freeze to death!
Wait, 5 degrees on Friday? Maybe you should have grabbed the handwarmers. We live in Indiana, silly. It's not like you can actually predict the weather. They may say Friday, but really, they mean now.
NOW.
Like when I'm getting my hair cut. Right now. I want it cut right now. I'll just hack it all off. No regrets. No worries. No responsibilities. Less shampoo. Less hassle.
No ponytails or messy buns. This could be a problem. Maybe just a trim.
Is this a stream of consciousness, you ask?
Yes. Yes, it is.
I'm a dead man walking.
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